The Bold, The Beautiful, and The Toothless

Norah lost her first front tooth last week, and she was pretty nervous about how she would look. She was concerned that she would look goofy and that kids would laugh at her. We sat her down to remind her that over half her class has toothless grins, and that she's in good company. We reminded her that everyone has funny smiles when they are between the ages of 5 and 8!

She felt better, ready to face her class with her one-less-tooth face.

Then came a couple nights ago...

A second tooth, in an awkward spot got very loose and was very uncomfortable.I told my sweet girl that it should come out.

Enter hysterics and insecurities.

Through tears our girls lamented about how she would look extra silly with another tooth lost, and she just couldn't handle it. Again, cuddled on my lap, I reminded her that she's not alone in her toothlessness. I also reminded her of where her true beauty must lie- in her heart.

God isn't looking at who she is on the outside, but is concerned with how she loves others, and serves him.

She knew.

She just wasn't ready to serve him with a greater degree of toothlessness- and that was okay.

Tonight, she had had enough, and the dreaded question came to me, "Mom, my tooth is bothering me. Can we get it out?"

What to do?! Casey was still in bed. he's the one who can stomach such things, and in the meantime, her gums were irritated and started bleeding again. I had to step up to the plate.

We were both nervous, and I won't go into details on the positioning of roots, teeth being squished together or that I had to try and pull the tooth three times before success was achieved. No, no one needs to know all about that.

After the howling stopped, I calmed down (insert rim-shot), and Norah raced to the mirror concerned about her appearance. She was alright. She had been able to think about the reality of her two-times-toothless grin, and so she was okay.

But I could tell she was still concerned. Why else would she run to the mirror? I had promised the kids that we could watch a movie. so I turned to Netflix, and saw that there was a new movie I hadn't watched yet, "Sweet Pea Beauty". I didn't really think about what the content was, but just thought that it was cool to see one that we hadn't watched before.

Perfect. Timing.

After watching it Norah said, "I think that was a good reminder for me to have tonight. I'm glad I watched that."

Me too. Me too.

For the LORD sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the LORD looks on the heart.”

1 Samuel 16:7b

What We're Doing

We've explained why we're doing what we're doing, but I've noticed that we haven't written about what we're doing! There are a lot of questions about exactly how our adoption process is going to work and what is involved. So I thought I would take some time to explain.

Already, we have started the process called a home study. What this is, is a collection of documents, letters, and other such paperwork that is compiled together. It involves pre-adoption education, and writing things about ourselves. Casey and I both need letters from our employers, and doctors affirming our health and employment. We need to show that we have established guardianship for our children in the event of our deaths. Casey and I both need to write short autobiographies about ourselves and answer many questions ranging from parenting philosophies to how we like to keep the house. We are also getting letters of reference from friends and family.

When all of this paper work is compiled, we will send it in to our agency, and then they will schedule a home visit, when we'll be interviewed and a social worker will make sure our home is suitable and safe for another child to be added. (It sounds more intimidating than it really is!)

With our agency, we are taking a somewhat unique approach and are enrolled in two separate programs- both are domestic. That means that the child we will adopt will come from the United States. Both programs are for newborns. One program is designed to match families with birthmothers locally, and the other is to match families with birthmothers in other states like Georgia, Texas and Florida. The second program is aimed at placing African American children in a loving home.

We could be matched with a child from either program! The local program has a waiting time of about 1 to 2 years, and the African American infant program takes anywhere from 9 months to a year. The waiting times are very rough estimates. In all reality, as soon as our family profile is shown to a birthmother, we could be chosen. On the other hand, several birthmothers could look at our family profile before we are selected. (A family profile is a photo book that we will make to be shown to birthmothers. It will give birth parents a chance to get to know us initially.)

It is very much in the Lord's hands!

With each program the cost can range, but we're looking at a total cost between $20,000 and $25,000 or $30,000. That's overwhelming to me when I think about it, but I know that it's not to the Lord. He knows every penny that our adoption will cost, and we believe that he's called our family to do this. We also believe that we will move people to help us, and he already has shown us his provision in so many areas in our life. This is just one more opportunity for him to display his glory!

At the most we'll need to raise $20,000, and at the least, $10,000.